February 22, 2023 - Felicia Lee was born profoundly deaf in St. Paul, Minnesota. At first, her parents didn’t know she was deaf because they never had anyone born deaf in their families. Additionally, she was quick with her eyes and healthy so they never suspected anything. Felicia’s mother became suspicious of her daughter’s hearing when she would use the vacuum and Felicia slept through it, and when she didn’t respond to loud noises. Her mother was concerned as to why Felicia didn't pass her newborn hearing tests repeatedly. At age two, an auditory brainstem response test (ABR) would finally confirm that she was profoundly deaf. After this discovery, Felicia was registered for Early Childhood Special Education to give her access to language. As the family started to learn American Sign Language (ASL), her mother used home signs to communicate with her and a few are still being used by the family.
As a child, Felicia grew up in a communal, traditional Hmong household. Most of her childhood memories stem from growing up at their custom built, nine-bedroom home in Lake Elmo, Minnesota; it was her paternal Grandpa Fong’s dream house. Their home was specific to their family’s cultural needs as it had to accommodate nearly twenty people; her parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins, all under the same roof. She describes her family as very close-knit.
This living arrangement gave her wonderful memories, but also challenges since Felicia is deaf. The family spoke Hmong, English and Hmonglish, so her family did not use ASL all the time as they had never formally learned ASL. Her mother struggled with balancing family and having the time to learn ASL. Eventually, she enrolled herself in the ASL Program at St. Paul College so she could better support her daughter. Unfortunately, both of Felicia’s paternal grandparents became seriously ill, her grandfather was home-bound while her grandmother became bed-ridden. With Felicia’s father being the oldest son and her mother being the oldest daughter-in-law, her parents took on the full responsibility of caring for her grandparents. Sadly, this meant that her mother had to stop her ASL Program at St. Paul College, though she knew the heavy consequences the family would endure from this decision. It was hard for Felicia’s parents to give the attention and help she needed because both of her parents worked full-time, had to raise their young family, take care of the extended family and still provide full care for her ailing grandparents. As she got older, Felicia and her siblings also assisted her parents with giving her grandparents the comfort and care they needed in their last years of life.
Following the death of both of her paternal grandparents, her family finally had a chance to experience life on their own. The family moved to Forest Lake, Minnesota in 2016. This was also the first time her parents were able to fully focus on Felicia and her siblings. Felicia has three younger sisters, of which one of them is also profoundly deaf.
Felicia first struggled as a deaf person and felt the overwhelming unfairness of being deaf when she and her younger hearing sister went to get their driver’s permit test at the DMV. She studied much harder than her sister, but did not pass and her sister did. She recalls that day clearly because her father wiped away her tears and said “Do not ever give up, you’ll get your driver’s permit one day. It will just take more time.” Her dad was right, she’s been driving herself and chauffeuring her family and siblings for several years now!
Felicia attended mainstream classes through the St. Paul Public School District. As a child, she enjoyed learning through the Deaf and Hard of Hearing (DHH) program throughout her K-12 school years. The public-school systems did a good job providing assistance to Felicia and her family throughout her childhood. However, after graduating from high school, Felicia felt lost and had to fight hard to get accepted into college. Her Accuplacer test scores were too low so she had to find additional adult classes to get her ready for college. It was a frustrating and exhausting process. She felt her transition from high school to college was disappointing. Her parents always assumed she’d run into many obstacles in life, so at a young age, they encouraged her to advocate for herself. For instance, they made her order her own meals at restaurants to teach her independence. These childhood lessons helped as she had to communicate with complete strangers when she rode the light rail to and from her adult classes. She feels the system failed her transition from high school to adulthood. As a deaf person, there are too many barriers and hurdles to navigate to access help.
Growing up, Felicia needed access to the deaf community for her to be a successful adult and have the independence she dreams of. Felicia had a difficult time trying to identify herself as a ‘lowercase d’, simply deaf because of her condition of having hearing loss, or as an ‘uppercase D’, that she is culturally Deaf and actively engaged in the Deaf community. As a young adult, she now understands that due to her growing up in a hearing world, her access to language was primarily in a multilingual and traditional Hmong family setting, with limited access to deaf culture and the deaf world, is a result of Felicia’s lack of proper support for her access to language. After much consideration, she considers herself as a ‘lowercase d’ deaf and is part of the greater Deaf community. Due to this, Felicia is comfortable that she was brought up using both ASL and Pidgin Signed English (PSE) as her means of communication. Despite everything, Felicia is proud of being deaf and is encouraged by her family and friends to help improve and change the lives of deaf youth and set them up for success because she lacked the support and services growing up as deaf minority.
Felicia is excited as she is currently in her final year at Metro State University, studying Human Services, Family Studies. Recently, she joined the Minnesota Commission of Deaf, DeafBlind & Hard of Hearing (MNCDHH) where she is an intern and advocates for community participation and engagement and supports small, non-profit event management with members of MNCDHH. One of her goals is to provide services to ensure a smooth transition for the deaf community to empower their own lifestyles based on their interests. She also wants to help connect everyone to do all the things they love and which make them happy. Prior to MNCDHH, she has volunteered at the Ramsey County 4-H program for more than 2 years, where she hosted numerous virtual classes teaching ASL to students of all ages and skill levels. She also volunteered with the National 4-H Council, a cooperative effort with the University of Minnesota to provide youths ages 16-18 an opportunity to build their personal pathway to achieve their aspirations for a higher education. She is currently volunteer in the Hmong community, teaching virtual ASL classes. Her life goal is to chip away at barriers that separate the deaf and hearing community, one person at a time through ASL.
Felicia shares some thoughts of wisdom for any deaf person struggling because of barriers in their paths. “Remember to be true to yourself, love yourself. Remind yourself of all those things people say to you, all the negativity they give you, the assumptions they have about you and allow those things to motivate and inspire you in your darkest moments and may it remind you to work even harder. I believe that it will help you become successful!“ She has personally walked this same long journey that others might be on. She’s had to fight and figure out her passion by failing many times. Now, she can say that it is those people who did not believe in her that have helped to give her the confidence to succeed, so to them, she says “thank you!”
Outside of school and work, Felicia loves watching movies with her family. She also enjoys taking selfies, catching up with friends, RV camping in the outdoors, and creating memories with her dog, Max.
The #CanDoAnything campaign showcases people who are deaf, deafblind, or hard of hearing at work, giving them an opportunity to share what they do at their jobs and explain how communication access works for them. This campaign shows what our community can do, which is anything!
