Mindset Shift for Effective Conflict Resolution
Have you ever gotten defensive when someone gives you “feedback” or avoided conflict as soon as it starts, fearing that engaging will make it worse? Many state leaders say they need support in handling conflict. This makes sense: conflict is a normal occurrence in workplaces. It is not a matter of if it happens, but when it happens. And most leaders do not receive specific training on effectively managing conflict before becoming a leader.
A key component of whether you will resolve or stay stuck in conflict is related to your mindset. A mindset is a belief that orients the way we handle situations – the way we sort out what is going on, what we should do and how to handle conflict. An “adversarial mindset” can escalate conflict, rather than resolve it.
Mindsets are often habitual and tend to be persistent unless we interrupt them. Mindsets can develop through community and cultural norms, personal experiences, work culture and other means. Whatever the catalyst, it is important to become aware of what mindset you use when conflict comes up. Shifting to a problem-solving mindset helps you get to resolution, and in the end is a less stressful approach for you and the other parties.
See if you recognize some of these typical beliefs and behaviors associated with an adversarial mindset:
| Adversarial Mindset | Problem-Solving Mindset |
|---|---|
| Goal: Win the argument | Goal: Wise outcome |
| Conflict participants = adversaries | Conflict participants = joint problem solvers |
| React strongly in the moment | Pause and approach the situation with curiosity |
| Attack problem and people | Concentrate on the problem |
| Assume negative intentions | Assume positive intentions |
| Focus on my position, or the solution I want | Focus on underlying interests, which is the “why” behind someone’s suggested solution |
| Assume I have all the facts and information | Recognize there are things I don’t know or can’t see |
| Assume I am right | Assume I need to learn their story |
| Come with “the” one and only solution | Be willing to explore options |
If you want to change conflict, you can start by changing your mindset from an adversarial to a problem-solving one.
Reflection Questions
- In conflict, do I usually want to win? If so, what can I do to focus more on understanding and less on trying to prove my point?
- Do I see the other party as an adversary or a problem-solver? How can I start to view them as a problem solver?
- Am I paying attention only to the other party’s position and solution or to the story and need underneath the position?
- How can I reframe this problem so when we look at it together, it generates a productive and solution-oriented mindset from all parties?
By familiarizing yourself with an adversarial versus a problem-solving mindset and reflecting on your own behavior, you can start to interrupt an adversarial approach when it happens and start resolving conflicts more effectively.
Resources from the Enterprise
From the Office of Collaboration and Dispute Resolution (OCDR)
- Developing a problem-solving mindset
- 15 Things To Do and To Avoid in Conflict
- Questions for resolving conflict
From Management Analysis and Development (MAD) - Conflict Resources
Additional Leadership Learning Hub Articles
Relevant Resources
LinkedIn Learning Course: Why Conflict is Necessary and How to Manage It